Member-only story
There’s Nothing Special About You
Addressing The Inner Critic And Healing Inside
“You’re a freak.” “You’re weird.” “You disgust me.” “You are not worthy of love.”
These are things I’ve said to myself.
It hurts to write it.
I ache for the younger me, knowing the torture I endured.
Now I know how important it is to be my own best friend and to love and care for myself.
But there was a time when I didn’t know.
Hating Myself
I was sick inside, but on the outside, no one else knew. It was my secret.
I hated how I looked. I hated who I was.
I often thought of ending my life.
I measured my worth by how others treated me.
When I was abused, I thought it was my fault.
There was a time I hated meeting new people because I thought they’d judge me. I was that insecure.
I often wondered what was wrong with me that people mistreated or rejected me. I never once thought it was them. I was convinced I was a reject.
